Keep it Simple
The Crone is a symbol of inherent wisdom. Although the Crone is the harbinger death, she is also responsible for birth and new life. She is our archetypal midwife.
~ KEEP IT SIMPLE ~
Making things complex for myself was an ego game that resulted in excruciating pain and suffering.
Every time I made things more complex than they needed to be, I fuelled my ‘Life is hard’ story, sending the message that I was not worthy of experiencing ease.
I was creating a life abundant with complexity. I was making my own life hard.
FORT McMURRAY.MAY 1985.FINE ARTS CLASS
Dear Journal,
This fine arts class that I enrolled in is challenging me to grow. I decided to take this class because I enjoy lettering. I have always loved letters since I first learned to print and how I love experimenting with colour. I thought this course could lighten the heavy cloak of darkness that hangs heavy on me these days. Expressing myself creatively has always been my way to escape the darkness.
This morning the assignment for the day sounded simple. Design a piece using words. Choose a word in the piece to be emphasized, using the colour blending technique we had learned yesterday. It sounded so simple. I was so confident it was something I could do and have fun doing.
Oh journal, I was so wrong. I chose the Serenity Prayer: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” I chose to use colour to bring attention to three words: serenity, courage and wisdom. I chose three different colours to blend for each of the three words. I was so excited! However, when I executed my idea, it did not look anything like I had envisioned it to be. I was disappointed. I looked around at the other participants and they were creating amazing pieces of art — at least that was my perception as I compared them to mine. The dark cloak around me got heavier and heavier as my frustration with myself grew. It was nearing the end of the class. Most had completed their projects and were sharing their experience with others. I felt isolated and alone in my dark cloak. My efforts lay in a pile of crumpled paper overflowing into the aisle.
Martin, the instructor, came and stood by the table. The shame and guilt around not having a finished piece was overwhelming. I felt like a failure. I wanted to become invisible. I held my breath as I waited for the judgement and the criticism. There was silence. I looked up and his eyes, filled with compassion, met mine. He picked up some of the crumpled papers and smoothed them out. He focused his attention on my lettering, and gave an abundance of praise for my talent, in addition to constructive guidance with the form to make it even more beautiful. He also gave me positive feedback on the layout, telling me I had a brilliant eye for the use of the white space. He then sat down beside me, took a clean piece of paper and wrote, “When adding colour, Karen, keep it simple.”
With his calm presence and positive feedback I felt better. The cloak that had felt so heavy a few moments earlier, was now feeling lighter. I felt encouraged by his words and was keen to learn. I watched intently as he added the colours, paying particular attention to the amount of ink he used and his placement of it. It was so simple and so beautiful. He used three colours in pink/red tones.
I took a clean piece of paper and confidently lettered the words, “Thank you”, blending three colours with ease. With tears in my eyes, I slid my hands under the paper— still wet with ink —and presented it to him with gratitude.
Journal, I was able to receive Martin’s kindness and positive feedback and feel it in my heart. It was genuine and I can’t help but wonder what it would feel like if I was more kind to myself. I also realize I could have asked for Martin’s help after the first couple of attempts. During the rest of the course I will practice asking for guidance instead of getting frustrated with myself. I am worthy of guidance. My biggest lesson from the day is, “Keep it simple”. I made it hard for myself by choosing to do something too complex for my skill level. Keeping it simple like I did with the words, “Thank You” allowed the creative energy to flow through me. There was no effort required as the flow felt so natural. This has been an empowering day.
Thank you for listening my dear friend,
Love you,
Karen
HALIFAX.DECEMBER 2021
Dear Journal,
Today I reflect back on this time of my life, aware that years have passed and that the colour has faded from my caterpillar name; however, the love and compassion for my younger self has grown exponentially. This Crone lens allows me to see what I couldn’t see then. Karen, the young and naïve woman who was a dedicated student of life has led me to this moment in time. She has spawned sacred wisdom that I as the butterfly can now share. Keeping it simple has been one of my most powerful life lessons and it continues to serve me well.
With gratitude and love my friend,
Katharina
Karen, my caterpillar name. Ink now faded. Wisdom to share.
SELF-AWARENESS QUESTIONS
Is there a ‘Life is hard’ story threading its way through your life?
If so, how are you making things more difficult than they need to be to support your ‘Life is hard’ story?