Connection Versus Separation
When I engage with and listen deeply to women, I am very aware that they are seeking connection.
What they are seeking is a need that cannot be met by physical or emotional connection. It is a much deeper connection that is nebulous and cannot be clearly articulated.
Women have always gathered in groups. From red tents in biblical times, to pioneer women’s quilting bees, to modern day women’s circles — women have always supported each other. Now women are being called to support in a different way than in the past.
I believe that the women I am listening to are feeling a disconnection — a separation from their soul, their True-Self.
The patriarchal conditioning has been to look outside oneself to quell the lack of what is felt within. In other words, one is conditioned to be co-dependent to feel whole, to have power. When one attaches to someone or something to feel whole, that is then believed to be their source of power. They have given their power to someone of something to feel whole and in doing so it creates a separation within oneself.
Separation is one of the core patterns of the patriarch.
The conditioning has been to focus on separation versus wholeness. For example, the patriarchal mythology has fostered a separation between males and females. So much so that the masculine and feminine archetypes have become confused with gender. The truth is that every human being has both masculine and feminine archetypes expressing through them. When these two archetypes are unified, one expresses wholeness. When they are not unified separation is experienced.
I often meet women who have experienced tremendous pain and suffering as a result of a male’s actions and they have rejected everything masculine. They do not know how to differentiate the archetype from gender and as a result they are not aware that when they reject everything masculine, they are rejecting their own masculine and are creating separation within themselves. Some women reject the feminine as they see it through the eyes of the patriarchal conditioning as being weak, not of value etc. When masculine and feminine archetypes function as one within, that is an expression of wholeness. That is power as there is no separation. An example of this power of wholeness in our physical world would be a river. The structure, which consists of the banks and the bottom of the river are symbolic of the masculine and the water — the flow — is symbolic of the feminine.
When unified, the structure supports the flow and it becomes what is referred to as a river. Removing structure or flow creates separation and there is no longer a river or an expression of wholeness.
Light and Dark—Wholeness
Another example that is not quite as obvious is one’s experience with light and dark —separation or wholeness. They are seen as opposites and are not often talked about as being an expression of oneness. During hurricane Juan in 2003, my perception of light and dark being separate shifted. Juan arrived on a Sunday night and I could feel the energy building as the hurricane moved closer to Nova Scotia. I kept saying this hurricane is bringing the light. I had no idea what it meant but I felt it so strongly. I had spent the weekend with a friend exploring various expressions of creativity and we ended our creative weekend playing with water colours on canvas. As I started at the blank canvas, I decided to create a very dark blue background. I remember setting the intention to make it as dark as possible. In hindsight, perhaps I was unconsciously resisting what was about to unfold. I have no idea how many layers of paint I used, but I could not get the deep rich blue I wanted. The more layers I added the lighter it got. I finally accepted it was not going to be dark. As I sat there with the canvas, accepting it as it was versus what I had wanted it to be, a white image started to emerge from the drying paint. I watched in amazement as it took the form of an angel. As I drove home into the intensifying energy of storm and as the foreboding darkness from the thick cloud cover, enveloped me, all I could see was the light in the dark. When we lost power, I wandered around the house with no need for a flashlight, in awe of all the light in the darkness. I would wake up at night amazed by the light in the darkness. My perception of darkness had completely changed. I remember roaming around the city saddened by the loss of so many trees and at the same time awe of all the light that had come with all the trees that had been destroyed. There was so much light. One of my early guides told me that there was light in darkness and that light and dark together are an expression of wholeness but I didn’t understand that teaching until this experience. I no longer experienced them as separate and was able to apply that learning to my inner process.
One can express themselves through darkness, which is commonly referred to as shadow, or from light. The patriarchal mythology deems shadow as bad and light as good.
When you resist the dark, you resist the light and when you resist the light you resist the dark. When you can accept both without judgement you are living an expression of wholeness.
You have taken your power back from separation. As you retrieve your power from the separated parts of self, you will experience a deeper connection to your soul power. This deep connection to your power within, will enable you to deepen your connections in your outer world. For example, you may experience deeper relationships by now being able to show up more fully. For me, I became aware that I was no longer concerned about what others thought of me. My only concern was being aware of how I was showing up and being accountable without experiencing self-induced shame and guilt. I was showing up in wholeness — my truth.
Knowing your intergenerational stories (knowing your cover stories and the stories that lay beneath them), allows you to take your power back from separation and supports you living from wholeness.
It supports you to align with your inner power and make choices that continue to deepen your relationship with power. Connecting to your own soul power enables you to have clarity and the conscious awareness to make the choice of how you use your power. In other words, you come to know yourself intimately, knowing your stories and your beliefs so they no longer have power over you. You know your values, you know your truth, you have honed the skill of discernment and you trust yourself to use your power wisely.
This is living an empowered life. This is living in awareness — living consciously. Showing up fully engaged in life!